Gym Idiots

Gym Etiquette

Dear Gym goers,

Below is my list of my "favourite" characters at the gym.

- Mr Dude who "overlifts and uses the wrong technique and therefore has overly bulky arms without much definition and has skin that is too white n pasty yet struts around thinking he has a very manly figure", please do us all a favour ok. you are REALLY not as hot as u think u look. ur arms look imbalanced on u. ur whitish skin gives u a pasty weak unhealthy look. when u grow old that will all turn into ugly slabs of fat hanging off ur underarms. and pls dont strut around puffing out ur chest n squaring ur shoulders n repeatedly oggling at urself in the mirror every 2 mins

- Mr Dude who never uses the towel, and sweats buckets, and leaves a damp stain n distinct sweat marks on equipment...PLEASE MAN...believe you me, none of us are particularly enamoured with ur attempts to acquaint us to ur bodily secretions..pls have the decency to bring along a goddamn towel for gods sakes n wipe down after using, and place it between ur body and the equipment when using it.

- The Grunt-A-Thon meister...dude, i understand ur need to exhale a bit but for christsakes mate, dont grunt n bellow and generally force the rest of us to put up with your incessant less than pleasant guttural vocal emissions. if u insist on emulating having sex with a metal machine, pls stuff ur mouth with cloth to block out sound.

- The I OWN THIS MACHINE selfish prick..who sits on the machine, not giving a shit about whether anyone else wants to use it.. basically jus hogging it when in b/w sets...now its ok if u have short sets but these guys have shit load breaks, and they jus .. hog it.. sits there while carrying on conversations..i mean...damn rude right.

- The VainPot...does 5 mins, and repeatedly walks towards mirror trying to be inconspicuous but not trying v hard..flexing repetitively.. checking himself out.. dude.. if u can make an improvement every 2 mins... i applaud u. but i dont think u can so u can spare us the sight of u strutting around..


Remember boys n girls.. if ur not gonna be considerate towards other users...then dont go!