Lets get married!

I have attended Christian weddings before.
I have attended Malay/Muslim weddings before.
I have attended Chinese weddings before.
I have attended Indian/Hindu weddings before.
I have attended non-religious based weddings before.

But yesterday I experienced for the first time a dual language, Indian-Christian wedding. Theres a first for everything in life. But it was funny to hear the pastor say stuff in English, and then, with the same intonations n highnotes, repeat it (I presume) in Hindi/Tamil. So he says something in English, and half the church laughs (the English speaking half I presume). Then he says something in Tamil/Hindi (the translated version I presume) and the other half of the church laughs. The Tamil/Hindi speaking half, I assume. The funny part is...they tried to outdo the English speaking half by laughing louder. After a while this sort of became a ping pong contest to outdo each other haha and soon the laughter grew to be disproportionate to the joke. What an experience!



Back during my first few years with my gf, the idea of marrying and being with and only with my gf was exciting. It didnt scare me at all and I could never understand why bachelors had such commitment issues and why my friends sweated profusely at the mention of 'marriage' or anything remotely associated, such as "see that baby so cute!" or "next time our house must have a baby play room from ikea ok?" or "im thinking of a bareback wedding gown" etc.

Of late, I am slowly starting to see their viewpoint. This has nothing to do with being married per se, but more to do with worrying about who to marry and whether she is right for me and I am right for her. Because, maybe because she has changed, it makes me doubt or wonder about our suitability for each other. But whenever I attend weddings nowadays, it makes me feel all warm anf fuzzy inside, and v happy for and proud of the groom for some strange reason though I don't really know these people except from work.

And it makes ME want to marry and start thinking hmm what songs to play and what to do at MY wedding. 1 thing is for sure - no grand ceremonies please. Just a simple get together among close friends n family, forget bout relatives except for uncles aunties n cousins, a real small gathering. Maybe have it on the beach, some kind of afternoon luncheon at the beach, with a live quartet playing some slow jazz music n good wine all round as the sun sets...and to cap it off, I could pick up the guitar and strum out a song in dedication. Haha..

Anyway...back to the wedding. Weddings alwiz makes me feel warm n fuzzy inside. Good feeling. But Christian weddings, with their solemnity, the exchange of vows and everything, just really cements things, and makes me feel truly I am a man now, a husband, and have to really change and be a better person. I think during quarrels or whatever, when times are tough, those moments in the church, comes in pretty handy to to remind us of our feelings that day n help us control what we say or do and to remind us of the vows we exchanged. Touching indeed. But somehow I kept thinking of Jerry Maguire when the pastor was saying like vows..and do u dorothy promise to take this man as your lawfully wedded blah blah..sickness n death..blah blah...haha...i could so imagine the bride there grabbing the mike and in a half crying voice sob out i do.. yes.. i do...


But I must say the whole thing smacks a little bit of patriarchism. The emphasis of MAN over WOMAN is constantly highlighted. Anyway just to share, pastor highlighted 3 important things to observe for a successful marriage.

The 3 'C'.

No, not the Singaporean version.

The Brickfields Tamil Methodist Church version. Companionship. Compatibility. Commitment.